Thursday, May 27, 2010

Stream of Unconsciousness

Off two days next week which is a blessing and a curse. Then I return to the team for an old client, working with their employees, all of whom are burned out and pissed off. The work will be about their defined contribution plans (aka 401k's) so they will be even more pissed off, since they, like me, are no doubt losing huge chunks of their money.

I need a major, positive life changing event. But what? I feel deterioration. I feel like I'm 100 years old. How do I snap out of this and get pull my life together? I also need people to stop riding my dick about wanting me to do things with them that I can't afford to do (or in some cases just don't want to do). My efforts this long weeekend will be to do everything I need to do for me and my environment and practice some mantras regarding being of value and worth lol.

Both of my parental units will be retired this week. I have them on the brain, hoping they live long and healthy and enjoy their retirements.

I'm going to get ready and head to work. I have my monthly "review" today. Another 30 minutes of waste at Micromanagement Incorporated. If I hear the woman that sits beside me say how she's a "high performer" and all the ass kissing she gets and pushes towards management, I might lose it. I'm surrounded by mostly delusional overpraised idiots who are fitting right in. I on the other hand have seen a little struggle because I have been having a bought of diarrhea of the mouth and unsolicited honesty as of late. Anyhoo.

Maybe Monday or Tuesday I will take a secret trip to the beach, not tell anyone, leave my cell phone behind, and just get my solitude on by the coast. Or maybe I will start NaNoWriMo five months early. Who knows? Perhaps the world is mine. The impoverished, near homelessness, defeated, tired, old aged world.


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