Saturday, February 26, 2011

Pick Your Battles

The other day while out to lunch with my homegirls from work, we somehow got onto the subject of boys playing with dolls which lead into a discussion about gender norms, where the heat got really turned up. I was completely calm making my point about arbitrary designations for things as "for boys" or "for girls" but one of my homegirls was resistant to even hearing such ideas and it just depresses me more than anything. I just shut up about it but the other girl kept going on because she knew it was working her nerves. Then they wanted to know if someone is born gay which is completely irrelevant to the point. The irony is the one girl loves sports but would probably withhold that from a daughter.

Then, later, in a small meeting with my boss, my boss completely LOST IT. She wanted to discuss a certain procedure and two of us were offering our insight and questions as to what makes sense, and why certain calculations are wrong. She saw this as a challenge to her authority -- not uncommon for her to become defensive when you're not attacking -- and exploded. She emphasized how much time she had spent on it. To me, it doesn't matter if you spent years on it if it's wrong. We are instructed to do this a certain dubiously accurate way and shut up about it. She's on vacation this week so maybe she'll chill the fuck out. It hurt my feelings more than anything that I was more or less accused of just trying to confuse her.

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